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Lady Gaga - "Till it Happens to You" - survivors together bring audience to tears

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felicity
Felicity Lee
Felicity Lee

Lady Gaga - "Till it Happens to You" - survivors together bring audience to tears

Post by felicity on 3/27/2016, 3:09 pm

This performance is riveting as 50 survivors move in behind Lady Gaga, with 'not your fault" written on their arms, and join hands.  The audience is truly moved - most crying.  Take the time to watch this video and realize that there are some 48 million survivors in America alone.  If 50 standing together can bring that much public awareness - just think what 100 could do - or 200 or even the amount who will read this.  

I wonder if survivors realize what the purpose of standing together would be?  I mean, we all have separate lives, we all have needs we want met, we all have friends whom we want to please, we all live in different parts of the world, and we all have choices we make every day.  Here on the internet, everyone can do their own thing freely.  They gossip and drama runs rapid, because it is just okay to separate and isolate survivors.  

One obvious benefit for survivors standing together would be to identify who the survivors really are - those who work to turn survivor against survivor are not survivors, but abusers.  I recognize predators by their actions - I guarantee that they would not be on that stage, but rather throwing tomatoes from the audience in anger that survivors are pulling together.  They would be writing emails to them and Lady Gaga threatening them.

The benefit of survivors standing together is that they might realize their own strength - in themselves - that has always been there.  We are separated by fear - both in ourselves - and between each other.  That fear has been instilled by the cultural belief that we are somehow 'sick', mentally deficient, unreliable, outcasts, unworthy, guilty, deserving of abuse, forgotten, unloved, and so on.  None of this is true.  Survivors standing together is not the same as 'support'.  Survivors don't need support from each other or anyone else once they realize that there is absolutely nothing to fear - it is an illusion created by a culture meant to silence us.  Standing together tells the world that we are here and demand the respect due us.  We have been hurt enough.  

And, again - why would survivors do such a thing?  Let's do the statistics of child abuse one more time:
Every year more than 3 million reports of child abuse are made in the United States involving more than 6 million children. The United States has one of the worst records among industrialized nations – losing on average between four and seven children every day to child abuse and neglect. (CDC, Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACE) Study; Child Maltreatment, 2012).  A report of child abuse is made every ten seconds.

Project MKUltra — sometimes referred to as the CIA's mind control program — was the code name given to an illegal and clandestine program of experiments on human subjects, designed and undertaken by the United States Central Intelligence Agency (CIA).  It is real - many survivors were a part of this.  Human trafficking is one the largest money making enterprises today.  Well, survivors already know this also.  

People often ask me why survivors hide.  Why don't they get angry?  At least make some effort to help the children who are being abused now.  Would survivors not be the obvious 'protectors' of children - knowing what they are going through with no one helping them?  

I am here to tell you that survivors are not mentally ill or weak.  When survivors finally get angry enough, the fear dissipates and they are no longer divided inside - they 'can' stand tall and together.  There is no need for 'survivor stories' to get people to listen - let's see how this works.  Watch the video and take a good look at what it takes to be heard, and here is another important reaction to the performance:





We can certainly discuss this - it is my personal opinion after many years of sitting silently - knowing some 1200 survivors and watching as so many fall into the lies the culture has instilled in not only us but our culture.


Last edited by felicity on 4/20/2016, 6:11 pm; edited 2 times in total



     

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Cambria
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Re: Lady Gaga - "Till it Happens to You" - survivors together bring audience to tears

Post by Cambria on 3/27/2016, 6:02 pm



Thank you for sharing this, Felicity. I had not watched the video until just now, because I did not feel that we were ready. Reading your post, we realized that we needed to be ready, and even if we cried (which we are, right now...so much weeping inside) we needed to see it.
Absolutely beautiful, and so, so powerful.
I wish I felt more hope for the human race, but I just...I don't know how to get past the awfulness on social media, the feeling that the world is just poison, and the people in it, more so...proven every day in stories I read, in posts I see, in politics I find...it is so, so f*cking hard.
But then I see videos like this and I think about my bellydance troupe and I know, I know that solidarity, and strength, and power in many, is possible...
I just...I don't know.
But I just felt the need to respond to this, and thank you so, so much for posting it. All of it.
I wish I had more hopeful things to say, but know that this gives me hope. I hope it does the same for others.
I want to share this on my Facebook wall, and share WHY I am sharing it...I am just working myself up to it.
Thank you again...

I...
Well, it's been a while, but this brought me out. Thank you.

-Cambria et al
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felicity
Felicity Lee
Felicity Lee

Re: Lady Gaga - "Till it Happens to You" - survivors together bring audience to tears

Post by felicity on 3/27/2016, 7:46 pm

I cried too - and, it is difficult for me. I just realized while watching that not one survivor had to say a word - just standing there was enough. The public saw 'real' people - not just 'heard' that there are people out there like us - but, they actually could 'see' them - men and women - and, the entire world saw them. They just had to stand there and hold hands - such a huge statement that needed to be made. I looked at their faces - and, saw the pain and embarrassment and doubt that it was easy for any of them. Then, I thought that we are the only ones who can make that statement. The public 'has' to see us - that we are real and 'normal' folks who have been misunderstood and hurt. Then, it came to me that first 'we' have to know that we are 'real' and misunderstood and it is not our fault. Or, how else will we ever get the courage to stand together.

I think that trauma survivors have been treated so badly over the centuries - every other survivor is treated as hero's, they 'are' assumed to be credible, and are respected by society as being brave and strong. It just has to stop; the attitude of society to change - as it also gives predators the green light to continue without fear of consequence.

I have hid behind derealization and dissociation my whole life - afraid - and hating the world that would be so cruel for so long - I never even thought about how I would have felt had someone come to my rescue when I had no one - as a child. How would I feel now if I could help one child who is being abused? Omg - I can't imagine, because I never have believed that I had any power to do anything. I think the predators count on us feeling that way. They made us feel powerless - it is still their biggest lie. We are strong and always have been. I truly believe that.

It will take some thought and some time - but, that is our next step - to accept the truth - it was not our fault - the predators need to be paying for what they did - not us. Our culture needs to change by punishing the abusers and respecting us for our courage and strength.



     

Don't miss the Ivory Garden Conference this year!!

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krathyn
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Re: Lady Gaga - "Till it Happens to You" - survivors together bring audience to tears

Post by krathyn on 3/28/2016, 7:19 pm

How Beautiful!
we are survivors, just as those returning from Vietnam or Desert Storm are survivors. Our culture makes us out to be "ill" and "needy" while war heroes are considered heroes.
we are also heroes, there are many strengths in us.
i would join hands with Felicity and Cambria and we, parts and all, are strong, we did not cause our abuse, we are who we are and stronger than most.



wishing you well-
Krathyn, Sebastian, Strawberry, Easebeth, Petrea
Krathyn of We5:    we accept all intentions of support--





krathyn148@gmail.com
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jules4002
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Re: Lady Gaga - "Till it Happens to You" - survivors together bring audience to tears

Post by jules4002 on 3/28/2016, 9:06 pm

wow thanks for sharing.. i needed that today
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Violet1
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Re: Lady Gaga - "Till it Happens to You" - survivors together bring audience to tears

Post by Violet1 on 3/28/2016, 11:00 pm

Thank you for sharing this. I did see her perform this on the Academy Awards this year on TV.
And I cried as well.

And them got angry that there are so many affected. Just not fair...
But I continue to fight and carry the message. For all of us.





..." and I said to my body, softly, ' I want to be your friend.' it took a long breath and replied, ' I have been waiting my whole life for this' "...
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Felicity Lee
Felicity Lee

Re: Lady Gaga - "Till it Happens to You" - survivors together bring audience to tears

Post by felicity on 3/29/2016, 3:03 pm

I have thought about my own posts and know that in the moment - and, when I feel motivated and angry, it is easy to feel strong.

It is true that the world-culture has been misled to believe that not only children, but also adult survivors of abuse are insignificant, not credible, looking for attention, and/or mentally ill, etc. How these notions have become a part of cultural-thinking is easily researched and proved - encapsulating not only our society, but also survivors view of themselves.

We were trained as children to never tell, that we are worthless and deserving of abuse, etc. As adults, we are threatened to be silent, afraid - afraid that we will never be believed, that the 'bad people' are around every cornier, that we will turn on ourself, that no one will ever care for us, that people will reject us....

Survivors are the 'innocents', vulnerable to every predator who knows how to push their buttons with but a few nice words, presents - able to groom them again - to distrust safe people who care for them, controlling them with lies and those hidden threats that all survivors remember too well. The fear inside - never say 'no' to a predator - a very real danger once accessed. There is no protection for those being abused or controlled. Survivors are not believed, suicides are never investigated, and most survivors are smart enough to remain silent - and, let anything happen - just hoping it will 'be okay'.

And, I am saddened. How can I stand for any survivor - when so many turn their backs on each other in favor of following perpetrators whom they fear rather than knowing that we only have each other. As children and as adults, we only ever had each other. Yes, it is all scary and really hard. And, I know that. I know that the world is a mess - and, I am not always very strong.

I am not saying that 'all' survivors feel this way - but, what I have experienced. And, how did any of us get to this point? Is it mental illness? Or, have we been treated so horribly by an uncaring culture that we would rather follow perpetrators than care about ourself enough to stand up to them and tell them, "NO"?

I have been there also - afraid to say, "No" - accessed and controlled. I said, "No," and felt the sting of ostracization - still do - as old friends are turned against me.

Knowing what I do, I can't respect those who follow blindly, but can mourn them as 'lost souls' and hope that someday they will hold out their hand and stand - free - for themselves and other survivors and children being hurt now.

At the end of the day, most of us have struggled with effects of abuse - normal, human reactions that are the result of being traumatized - characterized generally as mental illness - (trust issues, depression, fear, anxiety, flashbacks, etc). We fall into bed worn and torn just trying to survive one more day - wondering if it ever gets better - will 'we' ever heal? And, what the heck does it mean to 'heal'? And, why does it even matter? Survivors have told me, "Who cares if 'she' (perpetrator) is dangerous - I don't care about my life anyhow." And, so we deal with our own d*mo*s as well as worrying about other survivors safety, the reports of children being hurt, morning those we have lost - feeling powerless to do anything.

But, what we saw in the video is that 'all' we have to do is hold out our hand for each other. We don't have to do anything else. That is a start - and, easy enough for me - I think.









     

Don't miss the Ivory Garden Conference this year!!

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Cambria
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Re: Lady Gaga - "Till it Happens to You" - survivors together bring audience to tears

Post by Cambria on 3/29/2016, 8:01 pm

So many powerful words here...it means so much to read them.
So, my bellydance troupe is putting together a piece for a show we're doing in April. Our teacher called it "One Love", and basically, we're learning some sign language, and we are all coming out, together, to show our love and support for each other...it is going to be so powerful. If we can get a video, I will share it.
I get such strength from these women...and I know that my strength carries them as well.
Though so much of us feel such distrust in the world, we also know that there ARE those who would rise up, and hold hands, and stand tall in the face of the badness in the world.
We are together, and together, we are strong.

Best, with love,
-Cecil et al

p.s. Oh my, I had no idea that Cambria had come out to post before this, but I am so glad I saw it, and through my surprise, she said "yes. I wrote that, for all of us", and I understood. I am so glad we could share our feelings here.
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krathyn
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Re: Lady Gaga - "Till it Happens to You" - survivors together bring audience to tears

Post by krathyn on 3/29/2016, 8:22 pm

i stand with you, Felicity and all systems writing here.and its all of us, We7.



wishing you well-
Krathyn, Sebastian, Strawberry, Easebeth, Petrea
Krathyn of We5:    we accept all intentions of support--





krathyn148@gmail.com
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felicity
Felicity Lee
Felicity Lee

Re: Lady Gaga - "Till it Happens to You" - survivors together bring audience to tears

Post by felicity on 3/29/2016, 9:42 pm

And, we together also.

I so hope that you have a video made - that would be so awesome.



     

Don't miss the Ivory Garden Conference this year!!

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Felicity Lee
Felicity Lee

Re: Lady Gaga - "Till it Happens to You" - survivors together bring audience to tears

Post by felicity on 3/30/2016, 5:03 pm

This is the third time I have had to replace this video.

Really? This performance must have threatened 'somebody' out there enough that this video keeps disappearing - such a beautiful performance - who would want to bury it - silence it? As if it never happened - not a part of our 'history'.

I guess that I don't understand.



     

Don't miss the Ivory Garden Conference this year!!

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